How incredibly lucky are we in India! Think about it...so many essentials are perpetually in short supply. But the one thing we never run out of is—bores. No dearth of bores in our great and good land—that’s something worth celebrating, surely? We can do without diesel, water, power, food. Roti, kapda, makaan ko maaro goli! But bores? Mera Bharat Maha Boring. Mere Desh ke Bores in the Champions League. India would win all the major medals in the Bores’ Olympics. Well, at least we excel at something. Which is really amazing given our Boredom Threshold, which remains pretty high.
We tolerate bores...indulge them...praise them...pamper them. Why? We are extraordinarily unkind to animals, children, senior citizens and women. But bores have it really good in our society. Have we not heard of terminal boredom which kills? Why then does the milk of human kindness overflow when it comes to putting up with a bunch of people who can generate nothing more than a yawn each time they pop up on our radars? Maybe we are secretly masochistic and crave punishment. Or maybe we see bores as harmless creatures. That isn’t it, is it? Perhaps we are just too lazy to bother with bores. We let them be, just as we let roaches and other creepy-crawlies be. Because we are used to them. Our inbuilt intolerance is reserved for more important matters. ‘Outsiders’, for example. We also hyperventilate when we ourselves are monumentally bored—like during a cricket match when the run rate is so low one wonders whether the team is comatose.